The Last Straw, more like
Jan.26, 2009, filed under Miscellany
Here’s how sad a Marvel fan girl I am.
I have now seen X-Men: The Last Stand four times.
Four. Times.
Four.
That’s two squared. Hell. That’s the first prime number to the power of itself.
It’s three times too many. I can be forgiven for scampering to the cinema to see it when it came out because X2 rocked like a Gibson Les Paul, but that first viewing really, really, really should have told me all I needed to know.
That it sucks. That it sucks harder than robot whore with a faulty pressure sensor.and an over-specced pump.
The thing is, I had to have the DVD to complete the set. And then there was no point having the DVD without watching it at least once. After that I watched it again, just to make sure, one rainy Sunday afternoon when I was alone and feeling sorry for myself. Then it was on telly last night so I figured what the hell.
I keep watching it looking for a little spark, a hint, a glimmer of something halfway good, or at least decent, or if it can’t manage decent then how about promising? You know, the way Gabriel being the Left Hand of God made Van Helsing worth watching. Somehow. Despite the hair.
You’d think, given that HJ is still in there playing Logan, and Sir Ian McKellen is reprising the Magneto role and acting everyone else’s socks off by managing to look dignified and not like a complete twat in that stupid bloody hat, that there would be something in there to save it.
But no. There isn’t. There just isn’t.
Damn you, X3. I have given you four opportunities to show me some sign of redeeming yourself and every time the fastball special makes me want to cry out of sheer frustration and the casual way Mystique is discarded causes my very guts to boil with the infuriating implausibility of it.
And yet, and yet, you are still better than Ghostrider. I’m going to pretend Nicholas Cage had a mysterious accident in the Bermuda Triangle shortly after making Con Air.
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Singularity
~something that is singular as (a) a separate unit, or (b) unusual or distinctive manner or behavior; PECULIARITY;
~the quality or state of being singular;
~a point at which the derivative of a given function of a complex variable does not exist but every neighborhood of which contains points for which the derivative exists;
~a point or region of infinite mass density at which space and time are infinitely distorted by gravitational forces and which is held to be the final state of matter falling into a black hole. Sight
